DMX 'S NEW GIG? GETTING ARRESTED EVERY WEEK.

Looks like DMX has made getting arrested a weekly routine. When my sister brought this story to my attention I honestly could not believe it. What's even worst is the fact that he was busted in front of a crowd of people outside a Wal-Mart SuperCenter in Miami, Florida on Thursday afternoon....which was all caught on tape. Miami-Dade PD arrested the rapper, real name Earl Simmons, on an outstanding warrant for skipping another court date in Arizona related to his pending animal-cruelty and drug-possession case. Although DMX's attorney public defender did appear on his client's behalf Tuesday afternoon to provide documentation that his client couldn't make it because he was hospitalized in Miami (he wouldn't say why, though), the judge opted to issue a bench warrant anyway and raised his bond to $25,000. The lawyer wouldn't comment on reports that DMX is in rehab, although he did say that the Cradle 2 the Grave star's camp is "working towards getting him some help, and we hope that will be taken seriously by all parties in this case."

Also asked why a man of DMX's presumed financial stature needs a public defender (the whole "if you can't afford a lawyer, one will be appointed for you" part of the Miranda Rights), Kozelka would only say: "He qualified for us, and he feels comfortable with me." At the time, Kozelka was still hoping that his client could avoid yet another smear on his rap sheet. Good luck with that.

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"We are in court again next week on other matters, and my hope is we can get the warrant resolved by then and get back on track," he said. "We have some things in the works to get the warrant taken care of. My hope is that we can resolve it without an arrest, but he's been arrested at the airport before, so they obviously have an eye out for him, so I'm not sure."

In addition to an Aug. 19 court date related to his aforementioned pit bulls and pot case, DMX is due in court Aug. 26 to answer to identify-theft charges for allegedly trying to get out of paying a Scottsdale, Ariz., hospital bill by posing as someone else.

He was also arrested twice in one week during a June trip to Miami, once for driving with an invalid license and a few days later for allegedly trying to buy a small amount of marijuana and cocaine from an undercover cop.

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RAPPER DMX ARRESTED FOR THE SECOND TIME IN ONE WEEK.

I mean, really. Rapper DMX has been arrested in Miami, Florida for the second time in a week - after he was allegedly caught trying to buy drugs from an undercover police officer. The star - real name Earl Simmons - was arrested on Monday, June 23, on suspicion of driving without a valid licence and later released on bail. But just four days later, Simmons landed himself in trouble with the law again. The hip-hop star was arrested on Friday, June 26, for allegedly attempting to purchase $45 of cocaine and marijuana from a man, who turned out to be a cop taking part in a sting operation. Simmons is currently being detained at Miami-Dade County jail, according to Allhiphop.com.

The star's legal woes this year are beginning to mount - he was charged with suspected drug possession and animal cruelty in May following raids on his Arizona home. And previous to that incident he was arrested for allegedly speeding down a Phoenix, Arizona freeway in January, clocking up a reported 114 miles per hour.

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DMX'S BABY MAMA WILL HAVE TO WAIT A BIT LONGER FOR HER $1.5 MILLION DEFAMATION CHECK.

Monique Wayne (click on pic to the left to see its full image), the single mother of rapper DMX's illegitimate child will have to wait a little while longer for that $1.5 million judgment she was awarded after filing a defamation suit against the Ruff Ryder who swears up and down and all around that he was raped by Wayne. Last week, Prince George's County Circuit Judge Thomas Smith ruled that DMX (whose real name is Earl Simmons) was not properly served with court papers in the case filed against him by Monique Wayne. After an August 2003 encounter with Simmons, Wayne gave birth to a son by the rapper in April 2004. In a 2006 Sister 2 Sister magazine interview DMX said he was raped while he was sleeping. Wayne, who was not mentioned by name in the story, denied the claim and filed a defamation of character suit, citing "severe emotional distress" as a result of the interview. During a court hearing earlier this year, Wayne said she awoke to find Simmons on top of her, which led to consensual sex. She said she filed the lawsuit because "he lied to the whole world on me" about what happened. The January hearing resulted in Wayne being awarded $1.5 million after Simmons failed to appear.

Attorneys for DMX challenged that claim, saying Wayne failed to properly serve him with lawsuit papers and that the rapper was unaware of the case against him. X's lawyer William "Hassan" Murphy III said the Yonkers MC "looks forward to proving Wayne's allegations to be wrong" if the case continues.

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'THE STUPID SH!T CELEBS SAY': DMX ON BARACK OBAMA'S NAME: 'WHAT THE F*CK IS A BARACK? WHERE IS HE FROM, AFRICA?'

Boy, leave it up to DMX to say the most craziest and bizarre things. And you know what? For some strange reason, I refuse to believe that this dude has no idea who U.S. presidential candidate, Barack Obama is. How in the world could he not know who Obama is?! He better stop playing! I'll bet dollars to donuts that even Fred Flintstone knows who Obama is! Anyhoo, the rowdy rapper (real name Earl Simmons) says he doesn't pay much attention to politics. An in an interview with XXL magazine if he was following the presidential race, to which he replied, "not at all". But bizarrely, when asked about his views of Obama - who if successful in his campaign will be the first black president in U.S. history - DMX insisted he has never heard of him, and was shocked there was an American politician called Barack.

In the interview he says, "Barack?! What the f**k is a Barack? Barack Obama. Where he from (sic), Africa?" When advised the Illinois senator's father was Kenyon, he says, "What the f**k? That ain't no f**kin' name, yo. That ain't that n**ga's name. You can't be serious. Barack Obama. Get the f**k outta here." The 37-year-old explained his lack of knowledge, stating he "ain't really paying much attention" to the bitter battle between Obama and Hillary Clinton to become the democrat candidate.

Did he really have to clown dude's name like that though? Come on, now. He should really consider suing Mother Nature for malpractice of the mouth.

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'THE STUPID SHIT CELEBS SAY': DMX TO R. KELLY: 'WHEN I SEE YOU, I'MA SPIT IN YA FACE!'

Wanna read what has got to be a true and classified case of mediocre bitch-assiness? IF so, keep reading...

"You f*ckin' bitch. Whenever I see you, I'ma spit in ya face. He ain't have enough respect, when he see a nigga, to talk to a man face to face. You gotta talk to the crack in the door, because you in there with a minor?! F*ck yooooooou!"

--DMX ranting, raving, bitching and moaning about R. Kelly giving him the cold shoulder by not working with him.

'Talk to the crack in the door'? This, niggah, here! DMX need to leave that crack alone just as much as R. Kelly need to leave those little girl scouts alone. And that's real talk too.

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IN TODAY'S 'THIS NIGGAH, HERE!' NEWS: DMX TO RELEASE A HIP-HOP ALBUM & A GOSPEL LP IN 2008; SAYS, 'A DOUBLE ALBUM WILL MAKE MUTHAPHUCKAH'S MAD!'

I mean, really! Have you ever read something about someone that was so outrageous and unbelievable, it made you wanna just throw your hands up in frustration and yell to anyone within earshot, 'This niggah, here!'

Rapper DMX is planning to release two new albums in 2008 - one hip hop and one gospel. The two LPs, called Walk With Me Now and You'll Fly With Me Later, will hit stores on the same day. DMX tells MTV, "I (was) the first n**ga to put out two albums in one year, now I'm gonna hit 'em again - drop two albums on the same f**kinn' day, yo. A double album will make muthaf**kas mad, because they gotta spend more money - plus it's already a long (double) album. I'm talking about a hip-hop album and a gospel album." The religious star - who once considered becoming a minister - promises the gospel album will be completely "without cursing", adding, "How 'bout that one? No songs about bitches, no songs about robbing, just straight 'Give God the glory.' "

Young! Yeah, you better keep your fingers crossed!
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