A couple of weeks ago, I made a post telling you all about MTV's new reality live musical competition show,
Rock the Cradle. The show features the offspring from yesteryear's top music artists in rock & roll, R&B and hip-hop (read more about the show by clicking
HERE) as they strive to reach an imaginary status that their parents once held at the height of their careers. Well, needless to say, I was only interested in watching the performances of MC Hammer's daughter, Akeiba, Al B. Sure's son, Lil B. Sure! and Lil B. Sure's B.F.F. and son of Bobby Brown, Landon (from a previous relationship). Now if any of you watched last night's debut then you know that not only is this season going to be laugh out loud-able. Compared to their parents, damn near every kid who hit that stage was whack. And I know I wasn't the only person who thought so after watching the camera pan over to their parents sitting in the VIP section. Their expressionless faces said it all: 'Someone please remind me to sue Mother Nature for malpractice of my child's vocal chords.' I didn't see a proud face in the bunch. Although it was hard trying to gauge the look on Bobby's face because of...well, yall know. Imagine the difficult task of having to sit and listen to your off-key offspring attempt to sing as they could really could sing?! Those poor parents gave the phrase 'just grin and bear it' a new meaning.

First up. Lil B. Sure!. The
other son of Al blew me away as he sung his own soulful rendition of Leon Russell's
A Song for You. Although his voice sounds better than his father's (at least to me) and his B.F.F. and he scored really high with the judges, I still had a hard time looking at him. I'm sorry. But I did. Dude just looks difficult in the face. Bless his heart. I've always wondered what his mother looked like
(click and peep the picture on the right). When you think of someone named Lil B. Sure, you're thinking this person is going to at least favor his father a little bit, right? At least enough to take you back to the days of watching
Video Soul where you could see Al's tall, beige and handsome self in one of his videos as he sang in his tight-ass stonewashed denim jeans and matching jacket while doing the Alf. But as I watched Lil B. last night, I sat and waited and waited for that nostalgia to hit me, but it never did. Maybe his nickname
and his slot on the show should've been offered to Al and Kim's son, Quincy. And (sarcastically speaking) I still have a hard time believing Quincy is Kim's biological son because he looks so much like his daddy. But I'll digress. All that aside, I can definitely see Lil B. going far in this competition, maybe even winning it. Maybe.
AFTER THE JUMP, CONTINUE READING MY REVIEW ON LANDON'S PISS POOR PERFORMANCE AS WELL AS AKEIBA'S HIGH-SCORING PERFORMANCE ON 'ROCK THE CRADLE.'Mark my words: sooner or later if Bobby's boy Landon don't get his singing chops up to par, chances are he's going to either get his feelings hurt (and believe me after watching that hour and a half episode, he will not be the only one) or he won't last in this competition. This dude had the nerve to come out singing and wasn't 2 bars into his song before he tried to coerce the audience into helping him sing the song along with him! Waving his hands in the air talking 'bout, 'Yall, come on!' I'm looking at him like, 'Niggah, we ain't the ones competing to become a star-ruh. That's you! The first episode and you already trying to cheat!' I'm convinced Landon snagged his place on the show because of his looks and of course, his father. A father who he shares no physical resemblance to whatsoever. We viewers should all be thankful.
Last but definitely not least, along came MC Hammer's baby girl Akeiba. In the pre-recorded footage of her performance we saw a quick snippet of her father's rise and fall to fame (that too took me back, yall) which happened around the time when she was barely knee high. But as the cameras showed her rehearsing her song of the night, Love You I Do (from the Dreamgirls movie soundtrack), an homage to Academy Award winning actress Jennifer Hudson, it was blatantly apparent that she's grown into a full-size, beautiful grown woman. And even though we saw her struggle to hit that high note in the song, once she hit the stage everything flowed nicely including her high note. Now, I won't say perfectly because then I'd be lying. But out of all the nine performances of the night, I enjoyed hers the most. And my sentiments were mirrored by the judge's scores. Akeiba scored one of the highest shows of the night including a perfect 10.
But this is just the first airing. There's going to be plenty more. The question is, what star's offspring will have what it takes to make it to the end. I'm putting my money on Akeiba. To all of you teenage girls, grown women, groupies (male and female) and cougars, feast your eyes on Landon while you can because if his Thursday night performance is any indication of what's to come....
And for all of you who missed the show, you can watch the full episodes and/or clips from the show by clicking HERE.