CHILLI IN UPSCALE MAGAZINE; "IT'S GOOD TO HAVE STANDARDS."

If you haven't heard already, Chilli's new reality show What Chilli Wants will makes its debut next month on VH1 (Sunday, April 11, at 10:30 p.m.). I looked into my archives and realized that this show has been two years in the making! LOL! Better late than never, right? And for those of you who're thinking that her show is going to be in the same lane as Flavor of Love or For the Love of Ray J., think again. There will be no scenes of random guys slobbing her down (yall know Chilli don't play that!) or scrapping with one another like a bunch of clowns for a chance at some one-on-one time with her. Instead we'll see Chilli enlist the help of relationships expert Tionna Smalls to find love. Smalls, in turn, brings Chilli's celeb pals -- including TLC partner Tionne "T-Boz" Watkins and Missy Elliot -- on board for insight into What Chilli Wants.

Anywho, Chilli talked about her new show and why she is so picky and finicky when it comes to men in Upscale magazine and say what you will about her 'checklist' but one thing's for sure: Chilli has grown mentally and spiritually; therefore, it's understandable why she refuses to tolerate the same bullsh*t that she once dealt with back in the day when she was younger with men who shall rename nameless! LOL! In the meantime, check out the excerpts from her interview below:

CHILLI ON WHY WOMEN SHOULD HAVE A "MEN" CHECKLIST & HOW SHE REMAINS TRUE TO HERSELF: It's good to have standards. You can have your list, and whatever is on your list is realistic. I have a super duper long list and everything I have on there is realistic and workable. I think men need to understand that...I wear my feelings on my sleeve. Whether I want people to see it or not, I'm very true to myself and what I want. If I feel myself about to cry I'm not about to hold back my tears. I think it benefits everybody to not hold in your emotions. Stress is a killer...I am a real solid chick. Over the years people have always told me I 'm nice, because I am, but at the end of the day, I know what I want. I can be stern when I need to be."

CHILLI ON HER PERSONAL CHECKLIST & WHY SHE STICKS TO HER STANDARDS: "There are so many!! A guy has to be a Christian, he has to be physically fit, he has to have his looks on point, to my liking anyway, he has to be a non-drinker, a non-smoker, charming, funny...just to name a few. I know we only have so much time for this interview....You just have to have standards. When I have compromised my standards, it didn't get me anywhere. It caused extra headaches and pain. You have to make compromises, but when it comes to my standards, I stick with it."

TO HEAR THE REST OF CHILLI'S LIST, CHECK OUT THE TRAILER TO WHAT CHILLI WANTS BELOW!

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READ MORE AFTER THE JUMP!

LISARAYE IN UPSCALE MAGAZINE; DISHES ON NEW TALK SHOW, RICH MEN, ROCSI & FORMER BFFs.

LisaRaye McCoy is featured on the cover of Upscale magazine's April 2010 issue. And boy did she go in! FYI, for those men out there who're interested in LisaRaye , if you don't have any money or power, don't even try to come at her in any form or fashion. In her interview, LisaRaye dished on everything going in her life: a new reality show on TVOne, her gold digger status, her fall-out with her former BFF's Star Jones and Vivica Fox and those rumors regarding Rocsi hooking up with her former husband ("I looked up on the Internet and saw pictures of Rocsi in my backyard. I have never invited her to my house and I didn't know she knew my husband like that."). And she even admits (as though we didn't already know) that she wasn't in love with him when they married. Peep the excerpts below:

LISARAYE ON WHY SHE'S ATTRACTED TO POWERFUL MEN, LOVES BEING SPOILED: "My whole life has been a fairytale. Every man that I have ever dated has always been powerful, had money and been generous to me. He (her ex-husband) was just the next in line. It was like this is how I am supposed to treated. My father was my first introduction to power. I am attracted to power. So when people always ask me why you always date a man with money, why in the hell wouldn't I? I have my own lifestyle, it's like, I'm not going for less than what I have. If I can't be spoiled because he is not that generous, loving and caring, I don't want you. Go to the next one. I can wait. I don't know what it is not to be pampered and spoiled. I don't even want to try it. That's like saying to me, I'ma be broke. What do you mean? What? No. That don't work for me. That's not an option for me. I've never been that."

LISARAYE ON HER FALLOUT WITH STAR JONES & VIVICA & WHY SHE HAS SINCE REACHED OUT TO THEM: "Star had my damn back. She is a friend, a confidante and the bitch is smart. I never realized it was a problem until I looked up on day and realized I hadn't spoken to her in so long that I was like, 'Damn, where is she?' Then I started hearing about the little shit that Vivica was saying--that I f*cked it up for all of us--I guess black women, or whatever--and I am thinking, why wouldn't she say these things to me? I said, 'Well, tell her to use her own influence to get what the f*ck she wants to get!" Never did I think that anything that I was going through would affect you and your career so much. Sorry." *Kanye shrug* I have reached out to both of them and asked what happened and what is their definition of a friendship. Where are they? I know a New York Daily News article came out saying that my new reality show was about revenge and airing out our dirty laundry, but I'm too grown for all of that. I would never tell any of my friends' business, even if we aren't friends anymore. There is no interest for me in that."

AFTER THE JUMP, READ MORE EXCERPTS FROM LISARAYE'S UPSCALE MAGAZINE INTERVIEW + WATCH TRAILER!

LISARAYE ON HER NEW REALITY SHOW, 'THE REAL McCOY": "I am excited about the show, and I wasn't at first, but now I am. The show is about me, a celebrity transitioning from being the first lady of a country she knew very little about, and that fairytale-turned-nightmare. It's about me returning to Hollywood to pursue my career. The drama of all the rumors I've had to face involving what really happened in Turks & Caicos. It allows my fans to support me and my haters to hate me more."

LISARAYE ON WHY SHE HOLDS NO HARD FEELINGS TOWARD HER EX-HUSBAND: "I don't feel bad about any of it. I was the famous face attached to Turks & Caicos that made [the marriage] what it was. That has helped his country. I believe that he cared about his country and he was a great leader for them. He brought a lot of money to that country and a lot of awareness. We both did. I am proud of that, very proud. Now, did he want his legacy to end his way? No! But I would get married again because I am a fan of love, I am a fan of a partnership, and it is much easier to fight this thing called life with someone by your side."

READ MORE AFTER THE JUMP!

PREGNANT DEELISHIS & HUBBY ORLANDO GORDON IN SISTER 2 SISTER MAGAZINE.

Pregnancy and marriage definitely agrees with Flavor of Love season 2 winner Deelishis (real name London Charles Gordon)! A little over a year ago (September 2008) I blogged about Deelishis' announcing her engagement to Detroit business man Orlando Gordon in S2S mag. In that interview Deelishis mentioned that she and Orlando planned to have a large bridal party that would consist of 35 members including 15 bridesmaids and groomsmen. A lot has changed since then...both in her personal and professional life. Many folks throughout the blogosphere thought her wedding would never happen. Well, they were right BUT we have to remember the words 'wedding' and 'marriage' are two different things. And needless to say, a marriage trumps a big, lavish, expensive wedding all day every day. I ain't ashamed to tell yall that if a man as good-looking as Orlando wanted to wife me up in a courthouse or in a small intimate setting, all I want to know is what time does he want me to be there! Real talk. But it's only fair to say that their decision was a decision they both made together.

Anyway, Deelishis sat down with Sister 2 Sister magazine's H.S.I.C. (head sister in charge), Jamie Foster Brown and dished on everything from her marriage to her work to her pregnancy and the reason why they chose to name their unborn baby girl Lexington Brielle. Peep the excerpts below.

DEELISHIS ON NOT HAVING A BIG, LAVISH WEDDING: "I couldn't. I put it like this: I wouldn't. I had decisions to make if I was going to take the work that was coming or if I was going to sacrifice the work to do the wedding. Since I was a little girl, I was like most little girls who, when they grow up, want this huge wedding. It's the most important day of their lives. But by this time it was important for me to make sure that I was making the right decisions for my career. Our marriage was going to be there regardless of the wedding. So I don't know if it's a part of my growth and maturity but I was okay with not having the wedding...There was no wedding. It was a straight-up marriage. We just had a judge and a couple of witnesses. It was quick 'cause let me tell you this: the day that I actually did it, later on that evening I was on set. Myself, Garrett Morris and Joe Torry were working on a film called Pawn Shop. It's a comedy. I was getting paid by the day, so I was back on set later on."

DEELISHIS ON WHY THEY DECIDED TO HAVE A CHILD TOGETHER: "We had been trying. We tried for a little while. I said I was going to work on my album and I wasn't going to do a reality TV for a while. And I was constantly getting work as far as hosting parties, but that was not something I wanted to do permanently. So I said, 'Well, you know what? I'm going to really go hard with my music, and I'm going to go really hard with film. I'm going to audition for any and everything that I think is good for me in movies.' So I said, 'Listen, I may as well have my babies now--or my baby.' I wanted at least one more because Jasmine is 10 years old and I wanted another baby and I made that very clear while we were dating. Just in casual conversation he would ask, 'Do you want any more children?' I would say yes and I would ask him how many he wanted. He said, 'Well, maybe one or two. We both came from the same background mentally where we didn't want a host of children, but we did want one together. He has a 5-year-old daughter and I have a 10-year-old."

DEELISHIS ON HOW THEIR RELATIONSHIP TURNED INTO MARRIAGE: "I wanted a marriage, but what he wanted was he didn't want to change. Orlando has always had--I won't say a fear of commitment--but he never was required to be in a commitment when he dated other women. Yeah, he's gorgeous and he takes care of his business. You know what I'm saying? He's a go-getter. He doesn't want to be without, so he handles his business as a man and I really love that about him. And I know most women had to in the past, so they never required that he commit to them. So I asked him when we got together, I said, 'Well, you know that not who I am. I have to make sure that this is something that makes sense. And I don't care how promiscuous the picture, the web site, the video, whatever you see of London, I'm a well-adjusted person and I have a daughter. So I don't care what you ever heard of me, you've never heard a long line of accusations of men when it related to me, and I wanted to keep it that way.' I think the rumor that you may have heard was Allen Iverson, and that was unfortunate. I told him I needed that security within our relationship. So, he said, 'Okay, I think you're worth it, and I'll give you that.'

So we became boyfriend and girlfriend. Then eventually he was like, 'Okay, let's spend the rest of our lives together.' So, I said, 'Okay, when you put an engagement ring on someone's finger, especially mine, you make sure that it's not just to keep me still. You have to put a marriage behind that.' I would always tell him how fruitful our household and our lifestyle would be. If you give God what He wants, He'll give you what you want. So he said, 'I don't want marriage to change us. If you believe that we have to be married for the sake of God being okay, then that's fine.'"

AFTER THE JUMP, FIND OUT THE MADNESS THE PREGNANCY PUT DEELISHIS THROUGH AND THE DRAMA SHE PUT ORLANDO THROUGH DURING HER PREGNANCY AND HOW THEY CAME UP WITH THEIR BABY GIRL'S NAME. PLUS MORE PICS FROM THEIR S2S PHOTO SHOOT.

DEELISHIS ON BEING PREGNANT THE SECOND TIME AROUND & WORKING ON HER MUSIC: "Orlando talks about me now that I'm pregnant. He says that I am an emotional wreck most of the time, so he has to go into mute world; he nods his head. I think my father taught him this. I will speak and he won't respond until I'm done with my yelling or venting or saying whatever it is I have to say. And then he says, 'Okay, yes, dear.' He has the honey-do thing down pat. So when I say, 'Honey, I need you to do this. Honey, I need you to do that,' he says, 'Okay.' At the beginning of this pregnancy I was very whiny. I didn't experience this with Jasmine, but my first trimester was just miserable. I used to call Taj (of the SWV) and I would cry and complain because she had said her pregnancy with Eddie George--their youngest child was so bad the entire nine months. I said, 'Well, you had to have found some release in some fashion. What did you do for that?' She said, 'The only relief was, like, loading up a gun. So I had to decide if I was going to pull the trigger or not.' By the time I reached my third month, people said that if I wasn't going to have one of those nine-month-long sickness pregnancies by the time I reached my third month, that I would be okay. That's true. I'm eating a little bit better. I get around a little bit better because I was miserable. Orlando would cook and I would say, 'Close the door. I don't even want to smell it. I don't even want you to sleep in this room. I have a little Yorkie puppy, and it was so bad I was considering giving her away. I couldn't take the smell of her either. I went from a 36B to a 38DD. Ma, when I tell you I feel the difference, sometimes I feel like I'm suffocating. I can be driving and I have to unstrap myself in the back from feeling suffocated in the front. So flying has really become a problem for me. So, I said at the end of November that I was going to be done with flying by mid-December. And Orlando said, 'Well, you can totally take advantage of your music.' So I've been recording down in my home studio, and I'm excited about that because I never really took the time that was needed. I'm writing. A lot of this will be from me.

I'm very conscious right now and I think this baby is a different baby than Jasmine because I don't typically like water unless I put some type of Crystal Light or some Tang or something in it. I'm not one to drink water. This entire pregnancy, I love water. I love it. I love it warm, cold, frozen. This baby loves vegetables and I'm a big fan of Boston Market's creamed spinach. I like cooking now with vegetables; I don't like fried foods. But I love vegetables and water and fruit."

DEELISHIS ON WHY SHE & ORLANDO NAMED THEIR DAUGHTER LEXINGTON BRIELLE: "Orlando's name is a city. My name is a city. So we wanted to think of a city that was cute enough for her. So I was looking all over the map. He's Orlando, Florida, and I'm London, England, and so we gave her Lexington, [Kentucky.]

READ MORE AFTER THE JUMP!

DEELISHIS IN SMOOTH MAGAZINE: REALITY STAR DISHES ON WHAT'S KINKY IN THE BEDROOM & WHAT'S NOT.

First and foremost, is it just me or did the photographers over there at Smooth magazine do one hell of a job on Deelishis' pictures?!! And although I am NO homo, I'm pretty sure some of you guys will agree with me as well. Because we know in reality that her stomach looks as if a child got hold of a beige marker and vertically scribbled long squiggly lines down her tummy. Am I lying?!! (CLICK HERE and don't forget to peep her new Smooth pics under the following excerpts. Anywho, Deelishis is in the new issue of men's magazine Smooth where she attempts to school dudes on what it takes to bring out the kinkiness in your girl/jump-off. Below, read how Deelishis, who insist kinky sex is only for 'grown folks', fills you in on how to graduate to advanced sexual techniques when your girl is stuck on the basics.

**FYI: VULGAR & GRAPHIC LANGUAGE BELOW**

PREP WORK:'Alcohol is a good bet. I like Grey Goose, but find out what works best for her. Make sure she drinks enough so she's got a good buzz going, but not too messed up that she's on the verge of passing out. A comatose partner does not equal to kinky sex. You can also go for a phone conversation to warm her up. Talk about what you want to do with her and don't be afraid to be a little vulgar. Kinky talk, like kinky sex, should be raw and uncut. If you're really serious about it, then you can surprise her. Here's how: The next time you're home alone and you know she's coming over, put on a good porno and tell her to let herself in. When she comes in the room, make sure you've got your 'pride' worked up to the density of steel and sitting right out in the open for her. And don't forget to blast the volume on the porno.'

GETTING DOWN TO DO THE DIRTY: 'Here are some things on the list of kinky: sucking toes, having sex with your girl while she's upside-down, biting nipples, having sex in a Jacuzzi...with an audience, spontaneous making-out, ass-slapping, hair pulling, even some light choking--all of that is kinky. Dirty talk is kinky. It's the only time a man can get away with calling me a 'dirty slut.' Putting your finger in a woman's backside is kinky. Unusual settings are kinky, like on the hood o a car in the rain or on an airplane. And always, always remember: Money is kinky. Sex on a bed covered with bills, now that's a turn-on!'

FIND OUT WHAT'S NOT KINKY BY CLICKING 'READ MORE AFTER THE JUMP' ON THE BOTTOM LEFT.

WHAT'S NOT KINKY: '...There are plenty of things that used to be kinky and aren't anymore or were never kinky to begin with. Trying to have sex with a girl when she's not wet is NOT kinky (I'm always wet, so this isn't really a problem for me, personally). The missionary position is NOT kinky. A man screaming too loud is NOT kinky. Sucking on the clit too hard is NOT kinky. Fingering a woman's vagina is NOT kinky. If these are the kind of things your girl considers kinky, you've got your work cut out for you.

When you're done with kinky sex, you should be ready to pass out. If you've got enough energy to have a conversation about how good it was, then you didn't do your job right.

READ MORE AFTER THE JUMP!

BEYONCE'S FULL PHOTOSPREAD IN ESSENCE MAGAZINE'S NOVEMBER 2008 ISSUE.

My blogsister Ms. Chi-Chi (you can peep her celebrity news and fashion blog UrbanHoopla by clicking HERE) sent these scans from Beyonce's Essence magazine photospread to me today. The only reason why I'm reposting them is because they're much bigger than than the ones I originally posted a couple of days ago. Now, if you're an avid reader of RealGossip 101, you probably know that anytime I post magazine scans of any celebrity, nine times out of ten I'm going to also include excerpts from their interview. However, since Essence.com basically released all of the newsworthy excerpts from Bey's interview, there really isn't anything left that I'd deem worthy enough to post (you all can read those excerpts HERE and HERE). So in the meantime and in between time, check out the pics below by clicking on them to see their full image.

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BEYONCE FINALLY DISHES DETAILS OF HER WEDDING & MARRIAGE TO ESSENCE MAGAZINE + AUDIO CLIPS OF HER 2 NEW SINGLES.

Better savor it. This may be the one and only time Beyonce talks about her marriage to her husband of 6 months, Jay-Z, their private wedding, if they have decided to have children and of course her new album. Below are more excerpts from Beyonce's interview. To listen to Beyonce's two new singles If I Were a Boy and Single Ladies (Put a Ring On It), click here.

BEYONCE ON MAINTAINING HER PRIVACY: "I feel that, especially now, with the Internet and paparazzi and camera phones, it's so difficult to maintain mystery. And that's so important. Even in a relationship, I feel like not being that accessible is really important. If you think about Prince or Michael Jackson, or any superstars, you couldn't see them when they got off their planes or when they got out of the pool and didn't comb their hair. It's great that people see we're not perfect. But it's almost impossible to have superstars now, because people will never get enough. And it's not even about my music. It's about all the things that people imagine about me in their minds. But I can't satisfy everyone. I know that Jay and I probably do inspire people. And I appreciate people feeling proud. But this is the only way I've been able to stay sane, so why would I start talking now? [Not speaking] controls your brand. It controls what you want to put out there and kind of forces people to talk about what you want them to talk about. We decide everything. My word is my word. What Jay and I have is real. It's not about interviews or getting the right photo op. It's real."

The folks over there at Essence must have caught Beyonce when she was in a good mood because Mrs. Carter eventually revealed details about her and Jay's private wedding. Beyoncé tells the magazine that the wedding was very small and intimate, because she's not a "traditional" woman and having it be "her day" wasn't something she needed. Being a star and walking the red carpet has diminished the need for that over the years. "It's been my day so many days already," she told the magazine. She didn't want an engagement ring because "people put too much emphasis on that. It's just material, and it's just silly to me," she said. While she wouldn't discuss how Hova proposed, or even if he proposed ("We've been together a long time. We always knew it would happen," is all she would offer), Beyoncé did reveal this: They plan to have kids. Someday. And perhaps as soon as after she puts out this album.

Below are several outtakes from Bey's magazine shoot.

(Pics courtesy of Beyonceworld.net)
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BEYONCE COVERS ESSENCE MAGAZINE; SINGER DISHES ON NEW ALBUM, CHURCH & WHY SHE DOESN'T WANT TO BE REMEMBERED AS A MEMBER OF DESTINY'S CHILD.

I told yall the Bey-mocracy was coming and she's taking no prisoners. Bey the beautiful is featured on the November 2008 cover issue of Essence magazine and she's sounding off on her six months marriage to Jay-Z and her new album (in stores November 18), which she says is her most personal album to date, why she insist on attending church services (which must be a strain considering she is Beyonce Knowles), being a superwoman and why she doesn't want to be remembered as a member of Destiny's Child. Beyonce also puts to rest rumors suggesting the delay of her new album is due in part to creative differences she's having with her hubby and her father Mathew Knowles. Check out a couple of excerpts from her interview below. I'll have HQ scans from her Essence photospread up later.

BEYONCE ON HER NEW ALBUM: "I wanted to address my fans about my upcoming album. I have worked on this album for close to one year. I have taken the time so I can create my sound. Something that says who I am at this stage in my life. I have poured my heart and soul into it. It is my baby. It is the most time I have spent on any project since my first records as a member of Destiny's Child when I was 15 years old. I have recorded over 70 songs and have created a sound that reveals all of me. I am in a different place right now and I wanted people to see the many sides of me. The music is upbeat for the dance, fun side and it is reflective, passionate and serious for the personal side. I have taken risks here. I am not afraid and my music will explain it all. There is no label or tag on my sound. It's me and I am so excited to share it with the world on November 18."

BEYONCE ON ATTENDING CHURCH: "I completely believe that you don't have to go to church at all if you are disciplined enough to sit down and dedicate time to pray and get to know God and read the Bible. But me, it's better for me to go to church because it's hard to, for real, sit down by myself for that long, as long as I would be just totally committing myself in my house with the TV on and the distractions. It's way harder to do that than to go to church with a bunch of people who believe in God, where you can just feel it so much more."

BEYONCE ON HOW SHE WANTS TO BE REMEMBERED: "I don't want to be remembered as a member of this huge group that, you know, did whatever. I want to be acknowledged as a woman in a very talented group with great harmonies and great songs that made history and changed the culture of women, not only in America but all over the world. (A woman) who could sing a cappella and write her own songs and produce her own songs."

(excerpts courtesy of Essence.com, scan courtesy of theybf.com)
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LAILA ALI & HUBBY SHOW OFF THEIR NEW BUNDLE OF JOY.

The beautiful Laila Ali and her handsome husband Curtis Conway gave OK! magazine exclusive first photos of their 5-week-old baby boy Curtis Muhammad. Laila and her hubby talk about the planned homebirth of their son, what went wrong and who the baby resembles the most in tomorrow's issue of the magazine. Below are some excerpts from the interview:

"You can plan all you want, but things happen." That's Laila Ali's new outlook after the planned homebirth of her son, 5-week-old Curtis Muhammad took an unexpected turn in her 39th week of pregnancy. "The doctor thought that the baby might have a growth restriction," Laila explains. "Sometimes, when the baby is not getting enough nutrients, the abdomen will be smaller because the organs aren't really needed yet, but the head and legs will keep growing. When I got to 39 weeks, they [wanted him out] because he wasn't getting 100 percent of his nutrients." For Laila, who wanted a natural birth, the change in plans was difficult to wrap her mind around. After the complication ended in a hospital admittance for a scheduled induction -- "That was hard too, because I didn't want to be induced" -- Curtis Jr. entered the world on August 26th, after a 15-hour labor. "Curtis [Conway] caught him. He was able to pull the baby out. He cut the umbilical cord. They gave Curtis Jr. to me. It's important for the baby to bond with the mother in the first moments. I started crying immediately."

Curtis Jr. "seems a little feisty," Laila, 30, reveals. "He looks like a mix between his father and I. I wanted him to look like his dad!" The former boxer has quickly adjusted to motherhood, even giving Curtis -- already father to three children from a previous marriage -- diaper-changing lessons. When it's brought up that her husband is most likely quite comfortable with diapers already, Laila cracks, "Just because you've done it before doesn't mean you're doing it the way I want you to do it!"

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NEW SCANS: ACTRESS SANAA LATHAN IN JEWEL MAGAZINE.

The beautiful Sanaa Lathan is featured in the latest issue of Jewel magazine. The actress, who stars in Tyler Perry's The Family That Preys opened up on her relationship with her boyfriend, Adewale Ogunleye, defensive end for the Chicago Bears, her upcoming projects and what she likes to do in her downtime.

SANAA ON HER BROWN-SUGAR BOO ADEWALE: “He came highly recommended by my brother,” Lathan says with a grin. “We just hit it off right away. He’s really smart and really sweet…” At that moment, Lathan’s internal censor gets reactivated, and the intensely private actress politely says, “I don’t think I should talk about him. Should I?” It would be lovely to learn more about Wale, but she has every right to be wary of the press. During her relationship with her Love & Basketball co-star Omar Epps, there were reports that she was either pregnant or engaged nearly every other week. And she’s also had to suffer through all those vicious rumors about an affair with her Out of Time co-star, Denzel Washington, which she wisely declines to dignify with further discussion.

SANAA ON MOTHERHOOD & HOW SHE SPENDS HER FREE TIME: When she’s not working, Lathan loves to pamper herself with spa days, curl up at home alone with a good book, hang out with her girls like Regina Hall or Nia Long, watch The Iron Chef, and work out. “I really sound kind of boring, huh?” she apologizes. She also enjoys jetting off to fun spots with her man during the off-season. During the season, she attends his games in Chicago and on the road when her schedule allows......While she hopes to become a wife and mother someday, she isn’t one to listen to the ticking of her pesky biological clock. “I really want it to be organic. I want it to happen because it’s right for me and my partner,” she says. “Of course, there is that fear and the statistics about the biological clock and having kids. Whenever that comes up, I just try to breathe and say, ‘You know what? Just have faith that it will all work out perfectly.’ “That’s not to say that I don’t have my days when I get depressed or angry,” she continues. “But I definitely practice optimism and gratitude. I’ve seen a difference since I started doing that. It’s like your life shifts around you when you practice that attitude of gratitude.”

SEE MORE EXCLUSIVE SCANS OF SANAA IN JEWEL MAGAZINE BY HOPPING OVER TO URBAN-HOOPLA.
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MO'NIQUE IN OCTOBER 2008 ISSUE OF ESSENCE MAGAZINE; ACTRESS SPILLS THE TEA ON BEING MOLESTED BY HER BROTHER; HER NEW MOVIE ROLE. IS SHE OSCAR BOUND?

For the umpteenth time, actress/comedian/author Mo’Nique is featured on the cover of Essence magazine’s October 2008 issue where she reveals a painful yet unfunny secret she’s been keeping to herself for the past 25 years: she was sexually abused by her older brother from the age of 7 until she was 11 years old. ‘I was molested by my older brother. And even when I confronted him and told my parents, he said I was lying and nothing was really done,’ she says. Wow, right? From the way I’ve heard her speak about her relationship with her father, who doted on night and day, it makes me wonder why he wouldn’t believe his baby girl. Anyhoo, Mo’Nique, now 40 years old, says her brother, who is 10 years older than her, molested her four times over the next four years after following her into the bathroom and giving her candy. When she turned 15, Mo’Nique finally mustered up enough courage to tell her parents again after a very violent episode (which she didn’t discuss in the article) took place. And although she says she doesn’t blame her parents for what happened to her, she says there were times when she was angry at them.

“I’m not blaming my parents because me and my brother were both their children, and I just don’t know the kind of position they felt they were in. My father was very upset, but it never got mentioned again. I’ll never forget my mother saying, ’If it’s true, it will surface again,’ and I remember thinking, Why would I lie? Why is there even an if in this? I was angry with them for so long, because I felt as if they should have seen what was happening. It seems celebrities always come out with these stories. But we’re real people, and a lot of real people get molested."

As for her brother, Mo’Nique has thought about the repercussions her revelation could have on him, saying:

“It makes me nervous. It’s like, Oh, God, what will it do to him when people read this? And then another part of me is like, Goddammit it, it’s my obligation to let people know, and to tell women to watch their children. I’ve never gotten a genuine ‘I’m sorry’ from my brother. He still acts like he doesn’t know what I’m talking about. So screw hurting your feelings! You need to get your feelings hurt, and you need to get some help. Because I never said anything--didn’t go to the police or a counselor--my brother went on to do terrible things to someone else. He went on to sexually abuse another girl.”

For that crime, her brother was arrested, convicted and served 15 years in prison.

"[After my birth delivery] my mother put my twin boys (who are now three years old) in my brother’s arms and I suddenly thought, I can’t do this anymore. I can’t pretend. I didn’t want to make a scene at the hospital, but when I got home I called my brother and said, ‘You know what? If I never see you again in life, I’m okay. I wish you no harm, but I don’t choose to ever deal with you again.’…Parents, please listen if your baby comes to you and says anything like ‘I was uncomfortable with the way he looked at me or the way he touched me.’ Listen to them. Molestation has a damaging effect. I tried on several occasions to turn the pain of molestation into humor, but never could. I was too embarrassed to do therapy because I was always told it was a White woman’s thing. But therapy for me has been beautiful because I’m learning not to be a victim."

Mo'Nique's has not been in touch with her brother since.

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AFTER THE JUMP, READ ABOUT THE NEW MOVIE ROLE THAT ENCOURAGED MO’NIQUE TO SPILL HER SECRET & WHY FOLKS IN THE INDUSTRY ARE ALREADY MAKING HER NAME SYNONYMOUS WITH THE WORDS ‘ACADEMY AWARD.’

With Pepa and Faith releasing their tell-all books to reveal to the world what they went through, what prompted Mo’Nique to reveal her most darkest secret is her dramatic role in the new film Push. And if it’s as gritty as she says it is, we may not recognize the woman we’ve come to know as the funny and unpredictable Ms. Nikki Parker. In Push, which is directed by Monster’s Ball director Lee Daniels, Mo’Nique plays Mary Jones, a woman who sexually violates her own daughter---she forces her child to perform oral sex on her, beats her, makes her gorge on food--and let’s her husband continue the abuse by raping their daughter, getting her pregnant twice. Talk about being dysfunctional!! This movie, as well as Mo’Nique’s performance in it is so unimaginably ugly, unyielding and downright deplorable that some folks in the industry are already saying that this movie can do for Mo’Nique what Monster’s Ball did for Halle Berry--earn her an Academy Award.

"The boldness and honesty she brings to this character takes my breath away," says Daniel. "She metamorphoses into an absolute beast. Sometimes I had to step away and do a double take, because I found myself completely not recognizing her." Mo'Nique adds, "My brother was a monster to me. When Lee would say 'Action,' I became my brother."

READ MORE AFTER THE JUMP!

NEW PICS: LL COOL J. IN MEN'S FITNESS MAGAZINE.

Instead of experiencing a mid-life crisis like or letting his gut go like some other rap legends, 40-year-old LL Cool J is still as fine and as energized as ever as you can clearly see on the cover of Men's Fitness magazine's August 2008 issue. He is so fine, yall! He's also still growing as an artist, an entrepreneur, and as a man. While most of his 80s counterparts spend their time playing guest DJ at the hottest nightclubs or appearing on low-rent VH1 reality shows, LL, stays on the grind by working on his thirteenth and last studio album under his Def Jam contract, Exit 13, launching his Todd Smith men's clothing line, developing a drama for CBS and planning Platinum Nutrition, a line of dietary supplements. As for his workout plan, the rapper/actor, who's at a lean and trim 212 pounds, eats six to seven small meals per day to speed up his metabolism. He scrapped fried foods from his diet years ago but admits to 'cheat days' and 'cheat weeks.'

"[Seven years ago] I looked in the mirror and didn't like what I saw. I saw some ripples on my back and some spots that I didn't feel comfortable with. But I wanted to do it the right way and not go lie on somebody's operating table. It took a lot. I had to dig deep, but that is what I'm doing. I have more reasons to believe in myself now because look what I've accomplished. Let's be realistic: I have been a relevant figure in practically every era of hip-hop. No one else can say that. You have people who dominated one era. I have been relevant in every era and dominated a couple. Russell Simmons and I are the blueprint for everything you see going on in hip-hop."

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